A MUM has threatened to complain to her son’s nursery for telling him off, but no-one’s really on her side.
Posting on Mumsnet, the woman said she’s worried about sending “mixed messages” to her child – about where it’s OK to pee.
A mum has threatened to complain to her son’s nursery – after he was told off for peeing in a bush[/caption]
The mum explained her son is “recently toilet trained” and she has been “encouraging him to wee in the bushes” when they’re “out and about and there’s no toilet”, for example in the park.
But when he did the same thing in the garden at nursery, she wasn’t impressed by how the teachers handled it.
The mum said: “I picked him up from nursery a couple of days ago, and the person who did handover said ‘just to let you know mum, we were in the garden today and he pulled his trousers and pants down and weed in the bush’.
“The obvious subtext was ‘this is not allowed’. I do understand that they would prefer to avoid this, but I was privately pleased that he’d done that rather than wet himself.
She took to Mumsnet to ask for advice[/caption]
“However, DH (dear husband) and I tried to explain to him that when he’s at nursery he should tell someone he needs to use the toilet.”
Then yesterday, the mum was in the park with her son and tried to get him to wee in a bush.
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She says: “But he wouldn’t and kept running back down the path, looking for somewhere else to go.
“I tried to stop him and get him to go in the bush but he wouldn’t, and got more and more distressed until he stopped and weed in his pants.
“I just worry that he’s got mixed messages now and I’m not sure whether to raise it with nursery along the lines of ‘what was said to him when he did this/I’m not sure it was particularly helpful to treat this as a wrongdoing in the context of ongoing toilet training/can we agree a consistent message for him going forwards’ or whether actually this is entirely on us as parents.
“Obviously if he’d done it indoors there would be no ambiguity, but isn’t it fairly normal for little boys to have a wee in a bush?”
Responding to the thread, amazed mums said: “I can’t believe you would seriously consider reproaching the nursery about this. You can’t have children weeing in the garden, it very unhygienic.”
Others said: “I’ve never peed in someone’s garden” and “What would you do if you had a girl?”
One mum slammed: “Stop encouraging him to urinate in public and the problem goes away. The male entitlement here is just ridiculous. You need to play your outings better.
“That is what the parents of young daughters must do because encouraging them to expose themselves in public is obviously not acceptable. Little hint, it’s not acceptable for boys either.”
Another woman wrote: “No of course you should raise it with nursery.
“They’re a nursery, they can’t just have kids pissing in the garden. If he’s toilet trained he should be able to move from garden to toilet. Presumably it isn’t miles away.”
While a third mum commented: “Of course you shouldn’t raise it obviously. I mean what do you want them to do, allow your child to pee wherever he feels like?
“That’s not really being toilet trained is it? The clue is in the name – he should be using the toilet.
“Nurseries can’t have children learning the lesson that they can take their clothes off outside or anywhere they like.
“Imagine Ofsted coming and being treated to little boys pulling their pants down in the garden and using it as a toilet, presumably where other kids then play with toys.
“And what about girls? Should they just pull their pants down and squat? It’s just an issue on so many levels.”
Another added: “Of course he’d be reprimanded for weeding outside in the garden!! He won’t be able to do that in school, and shouldn’t be doing it in nursery!
“It’s a last resort situation to wee in a bush outside, and you should absolutely be encouraging him to use a travel potty.
“I have absolutely no idea why you’re baffled that they aren’t pleased with him whacking his penis out in public and pissing all over the garden, and why you’re praising it!!”